Tag Archive for letting go of defenses

To Medina and Beyond…

Fall is upon us and I can already feel the change in the air – the shift of the season – the transition in my energy. As much as I love the heat of Summer in the city, it’s exactly what makes me embrace the crisp and chilly air of Autumn.

I recently returned from a wonderful journey to Morocco. 7 days / 7 cities, I experienced the historical northern cities of Tangier, Tetouan, Chefchaouen to the faster pace of Fes down to the surreal and powerful Sahara Desert (Merzouga) and finally to the “red city”, Marrakesh. Had the honor of meeting the most amazing and generous people I have ever met in my life that opened up their homes and hearts to us. This was not only the cultural experience I have longed for the past 2 years but one of spiritual connection that will be engrained in me for life. (If you’re traveling to Morocco, I would love to share with you the amazing recommendations and connections I discovered!)

Often when traveling internationally I put up a protective shield to guard myself from being the doe eyed traveler I can sometimes be taking in the wonders of a new city. As warm and welcoming as the Moroccans were I was still very skeptical and at times found myself defensive and gripping to my American way. I came to realize that their humble way of life and their giving nature was not a facade and I had to let go and embrace it.

I later came across this reading from Daily OM that reminded me of why we hold on so tight to our boundaries and defenses and what comes from letting them go. Wanted to share with you and hope this speaks to you as it did to me.

Sending you all so much love, peace, happiness + wellness this Autumn and always. 

DAILY OM writes:

Trees grow up through their branches and down through their roots into the earth. They also grow wider with each passing year. As they do, they shed the bark that served to protect them but now is no longer big enough to contain them. In the same way, we create boundaries and develop defenses to protect ourselves and then, at a certain point, we outgrow them. If we don’t allow ourselves to shed our protective layer, we can’t expand to our full potential. 

Trees need their protective bark to enable the delicate process of growth and renewal to unfold without threat. Likewise, we need our boundaries and defenses so that the more vulnerable parts of ourselves can safely heal and unfold. But our growth also depends upon our ability to soften, loosen, and shed boundaries and defenses we no longer need. It is often the case in life that structures we put in place to help us grow eventually become constricting. 

Unlike a tree, we must consciously decide when it’s time to shed our bark and expand our boundaries, so we can move into our next ring of growth. Many spiritual teachers have suggested that our egos don’t disappear so much as they become large enough to hold more than just our small sense of self — the boundary of self widens to contain people and beings other than just “me.” Each time we shed a layer of defensiveness or ease up on a boundary that we no longer need, we metaphorically become bigger people. With this in mind, it is important that we take time to question our boundaries and defenses. While it is essential to set and honor the protective barriers we have put in place, it is equally important that we soften and release them when the time comes. In doing so, we create the space for our next phase of growth. 

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